The last few years were difficult on relationships, especially the distant ones. The pandemic limited travel, so visiting your distant family members was limited. Usually it is easier to maintain a healthy relationship with your loved ones who are in one household and generally these relationships are real close ones like parent-child or sometimes child- grandparents. Relationships outside one household prove to be more difficult to maintain, especially when this relationship expands over country borders or perhaps continents.
Modern technology makes this task much easier; however distant relationships in many occasions still suffer. One finds it very difficult to maintain some relationship with one’s first, second or even third cousins, uncles, aunties and most of the time you have two branches of multiple sets of these relationships. The number of this kind of relationships in some cases is very large. Are these relationships important to maintain? Should I try my hardest to keep these relationships in as good as possible state?
To answer these questions we will have to take a look at some Bible examples:
Apostle Paul gives Timothy instructions to best prepare him for the ministry within the church. He instructs him on all sorts of aspects of church and social life. Amongst these, Apostle Paul draws special attention to family relationships. In 1 Timothy 5:8, although in the first place he is talking about the widows in the family, he also makes reference to taking care or maintaining close or distant relationship.
“But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.” 1 Timothy 5:8
Here Apostle Paul is describing the person who neglects to take care of these relationships to a person who denied the faith or worse than an infidel. Timothy was to teach this principle to the churches he was to minister in. He was to educate the members of society to look after their own; providing and caring for the wellbeing of their immediate and distant relatives.
Imagine a world where every person in need is taken care of by another relative, close or distant. This is actually the principle of heaven. God also instructed the Israelites how to have and maintain a healthy society where every member at every level of society is taken care of and looked after. But unfortunately, our world has changed so much due to the appearance of sin. Selfishness that started with Satan, was passed on to the entire human race and normalised a new standard of living, which we could sum up as the following: I have to take care of myself first, then if I have leftover energy, money and resources, I will help others as well.
This is not to say that there are no individuals or families who do not live by this new principle of life that rules our world since sin. It is the duty of every Christian to recognise the damage done and work on the restoration of all heavenly principles.
The principle of heaven is to give, more than others can give you back. This does not in all cases mean money or goods, but tender love and care others may so much need, especially those in our household – relatives. Christ came and gave us more than we ever can pay back. Why? Because He considers us His family. Please read Hebrews 2:10 -17; a beautiful passage!
We have a lot to learn from Jesus. During His earthly ministry he also made it very clear to us, that family relationships were not to be neglected. On the contrary, they are to be maintained. When one of His earthly relatives was getting married, He attended the wedding. In fact, He performed His first miracle at that wedding, honouring the newly wedded couple and His extended family by His presence and also by the miracle that was to serve as an object lesson with multiple meanings.
We also know that He did not neglect His cousin – John the Baptist – when John was imprisoned. He sent a message of reassurance that his labour was not in vain. The messengers were to report about all the miracles that Jesus performed so John’s faith would be strengthened. Jesus also added: “And blessed is he, whosoever shall not be offended in me.” Luke 7:23
So dear reader, do you have some long-forgotten uncle, aunt, cousin or distant relative you have not seen for long or had contact with? It is time for you not to be an infidel, but exercise your faith. Grab a phone, give them a call, write them a letter, let them know you think of them and care for them. Remember the maintenance or rekindling of a relationship starts with you. If you are willing to make the first step, this will encourage the other side also, to put effort in and God will be very pleased to see mended relationships.
After all He is the one that created us to live in such a structured social network. And why? Because he knows how much we are encouraged by kind words spoken from one member of the family to another. May God bless you with restored and healthy relationships.
In our next article we will take a look at how our everyday life could be improved by good and healthy work relationships. Until then!